Why Marriage? – Mari Nichols-Haining
Because to the depths of me, I long to love one person,
With all my heart, my soul, my mind, my body…
Because I need a forever friend to trust with the intimacies of me,
Who won’t hold them against me,
Who loves me when I am unlikable,
Who sees the small child in me, and
Who looks for the divine potential of me …
Because I need to cuddle in the warmth of the night
With someone who thanks God for me,
with someone I feel blessed to hold …
Because marriage means opportunity
To grow in love and friendship …
Because marriage is a discipline
To be added to a list of achievements …
Because marriages do not fail, people fail
When they enter into marriage
expecting another to make them whole …
Because, knowing this,
I promise myself to take full responsibility
For my spiritual, mental and physical wholeness
I create me,
I take half of the responsibility for my marriage
Together we create our marriage …
Because with this understanding
The possibilities are limitless
The Prophet – Kahlil Gibran
This extract from Gibran’s “The Prophet” gives an understanding of marriage in which two individuals engage in a healthy, mutually nurturing relationship while still retaining their individuality.
Then Almitra spoke again and said, “And what of Marriage, master?”
And he answered saying:
You were born together, and together you shall be forevermore.
You shall be together when white wings of death scatter your days.
Aye, you shall be together even in the silent memory of God.
But let there be spaces in your togetherness,
And let the winds of the heavens dance between you.
Love one another but make not a bond of love:
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Fill each other’s cup but drink not from one cup.
Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf.
Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone,
Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music.
Give your hearts, but not into each other’s keeping.
For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.
And stand together, yet not too near together:
For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other’s shadow.
The Art Of A Good Marriage – Wilferd Arlan Peterson
A good marriage must be created.
In marriage the little things are the big things…
It is never being too old to hold hands,
It is remembering to say “I love you” at least once a day,
It is never going to sleep angry,
It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives,
It is standing together and facing the world,
It is forming a circle of love that gathers in the whole family,
It is speaking words of appreciation and demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways,
It is having the capacity to forgive and forget,
It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow,
It is a common search for the good and the beautiful,
It is not only marrying the right person, it is being the right partner.
Marriage Advice – Jane Wells
Let your love be stronger than your hate or anger.
Learn the wisdom of compromise, for it is better to bend a little than to break.
Believe the best rather than the worst.
People have a way of living up or down to your opinion of them.
Remember that true friendship is the basis for any lasting relationship.
The person you choose to marry is deserving of the courtesies
and kindnesses you bestow on your friends.
Please hand this down to your children and your children’s children.
The Most Wonderful Of All Things In Life – Sir Hugh Walpole
The most wonderful of all things in life is the discovery of another human being with whom one’s relationship has a growing depth, beauty and joy as the years increase. This inner progressiveness of love between two human beings is a most marvellous thing; it cannot be found by looking for it or by passionately wishing for it. It is a sort of divine accident, and the most wonderful of all things in life.